Busy Girl has been playing on the same soccer team for 3 years. The coach is pretty good and the kids have a good time. Yes, I know fun (and the hokey pokey) is what it's all about.
The problem is that these kids aren't improving in the game, at all. Busy Girl is the best player we have (I'm not sure how to say that without sounding like a "My kid's the best and the others don't compare" kind of thing, so I'm taking my chances here). I don't care if they win, I just want them to learn to play the game and then play it. In the great scheme of things, Busy Girl is an OK player, but the other kids are just not athletes of any sort and the team is not even competing. They won some games when they were younger, but it was all chance then.
Again, I do understand that it's important for them to have fun, and they are for the most part. But, they moved up a division and the fact is that things are more competitive. They got smushed today 7-0, that won't be fun for long.
Busy Girl can't do it by herself! Example: she was in the goal and when the ball got by our defenders, they just stood there and watched it roll instead of going after it again. That's OK if you are 5 or 6 years old, but these kids have been playing for years! Busy Girl was left in the goal alone against 4 of the other teams players! She did stop the ball all but 2 of the times. When she was on offense, she was the only one who took a shot in the whole 50 minutes of the game!
I could go on, but I'll spare you. I'm so frustrated right now, I could scream. Busy Girl isn't overly upset about it, but she knows it's not like it's supposed to be.
Moving her to another team won't work right now, she's been with them too long and I don't want to do that to her. I'm just mad.
« I'm done now!
I hear ya, Busy Mom! We are in the same boat with Kidlet Sr. I am not sure there is a good answer unless you change leagues. (Not sure if that is possible where you are, but we have way too many soccer leagues here.)
My best advice, suck it up and let her have fun and rant to other soccer moms who get it. If it doesn't bother her, let it go. (Easier said than done, but trust me...I am telling myself this probably more than you!) lol
Enjoy your season anyway~
Perhaps Busy Dad could volunteer to be an assistant coach? Or maybe the parents could have a talk with the current coaching staff and voice (in a friendly manner, of course) their concerns. See if maybe the current coaches are frustrated with anything themselves that the parents could help out with. If you go to them with a problem, you should be armed with a few possible solutions. That keeps it from just being a bitch session. Good luck and I hope Busy Girl continues to have fun.
Ready to coach, Busy Mom?
Clarification: the coach is pretty good, the team just really doesn't seem to "get it".
Is it possible that the others aren't really interested in trying because they don't want to sweat? I just remember being on sports teams and around age 10 not really trying too hard because i didn't want to ruin my "look"...ya know, sweat isn't so cute. It seems like kids are worring about that kind of stuff earlier and earlier in life. I was at my nieces' soccer game a couple weeks ago (she is 9) and noticing some of the girls were really cuted up and not too interested in the game. They were just there for the social aspect. If thats whats going on and your daughter is really interested in the sport you may have to think about getting her into a more competitive league. I think i'd just ask her what she wants to do.?????...
Don't have much help, but I understand. Urchin #2 is our soccer player, and we've run into this. (Urchin #1 played soccer a few seasons, but now he's into trying to blow up stuff and take over the world--wow, after seeing that in print I wonder if I should be worried *LOL*). At least here they change up the teams every year, and once they're in U9/U10 they go through observations and put them on teams and in divisions based on that.
Hi Busy Mom, you are right in your approach here. Indeed, the children should play first of all to enjoy themselves. Whether or not they win is secondary. I hate the approach of some parents to sports with their children. They want them to win at all costs. That is wrong and gives their children incorrect values with which to grow up, and they take these values into their teen years and adulthood. Nothing is wrong with striving for excellence, but children need to know that they cannot always win and there will be better teams as well. Once you have done your best, then that's good enough. The same can be said for academics.
When it becomes a recurrent problem then steps need to be taken to improve on weaknesses.
When teams become more competitive and the others are not pulling their weight, it really doesn't make much sense, as no one player, no matter how good, does a team make. The coach needs to motivate those who aren't performing and if they don't improve, then the tough decision of replacing them may have to become an option. Dealing with the reaction of these children and their PARENTS is easier said than done.
Tell Busy Girl to keep doing her stuff on the field.
Olivier has stopped playing football (soccer)because he was sooooo frustrated. He got into trouble because he wouldn't shake hands with a team that had injured 4 of his team mates. This year he's giving Kick Boxing a go.
I am so there for you Busy Mom. From one soccer mom to another I get it. We actually had a good soccer weekend--I'll take it when I can cqause next week could be a different story. We used to have a "ball hog"last year who never passed the ball luckily we've moved up top U9 division and all girls. There's a world of difference. Tell Busy Girl "chin up" and keep reminding her that she's doing her best and that's all she can do. Perhaps Busy Girl should start motivating her team mates by yelling at them???
You want the kid to improve at the game? Get her to work on touch and control in the yard. Keepy-ups are good for this. If she can juggle the ball she' have more confidence on the pitch. (she can work on this alone) Try also working on ball against the wall type games - aiming for speed of feet and control. At this age kids should work on these skills a lot! Working on team stuff comes later.
Also, if she gets good at these skills ahe will look flash and be able to pose - which is important for all kids:)
If you are happy with the coach and the team spirit, that seems to be the important bit right now.
Have fun