Well, we're gonna have ourselves a surgery.
The scene: scheduling a fairly routine surgery for someone who takes blood thinner.
The players:
Surgeon - dude that will be slicing my father's spine open.
Surgeon's nurse - works with above
Cardiologist - nice guy who takes care of my dad's heart
Cardiologist's nurse - works with above
PCP's nurse - nurse who works with my dad's regular physician
Coumadin clinic - folks who obessively track my dad's blood thinner level. They like to know everything and get cranky when you don't tell them about things like having invasive procedures. We found out the hard way when he had his steroid injection.
My Dad - My Dad
Me - Me
Act I
Surgeon: "Well, looks like we need to schedule surgery for you."
My Dad: "OK, but, I take coumadin, what do you want me to do about that?"
Surgeon: "Stop taking it before surgery."
Me: "Could you be, um, you know, a little more specific since he kinda needs the stuff?
Surgeon: "Blah, blah...take this, stop that, start this, etc. I'll write it down."
Me: "OK, I've got it, can you tell the coumadin clinic since they will have a calf about changing his meds?"
Surgeon: "You can call them."
Me: "Fine, but, they'll have something to say about it."
Coumadin clinic (proactively): "You never tell us, anything! You never tell us anything! The answer is 'No, you can't do it!"
Surgeon: "Here is where you go for pre-admission testing, they'll draw blood and do some tests. Oh, and I'll need a statement from your PCP that it's OK to do the surgery."
Act II
Me (to PCP's nurse): "I need a statement that says it's OK for him to have the surgery".
PCP's nurse: "Yeah, we do that all the time, how about a 2:45 appointment?"
Me: "Huh? What for?"
PCP's nurse: "He'll want to draw some blood and do some tests."
Coumadin clinic (proactively): "You never tell us, anything! You never tell us anything! The answer is 'No, you can't do it!"
Me: "How is that different from the Pre-Admission Testing (very common before surgery) he has to have?"
PCP's nurse: "I dunno, but, he'll have to have blood drawn and do some tests."
Me: "What will you be doing that PAT (Pre-Admission Testing) won't be doing?"
PCP's nurse: "What's PAT?"
Me: "Pre-Admission Testing."
PCP's nurse: "What's that?"
Me: "Help me out, here, tell me what you'll be doing, because, right after your visit we're going to try to go to PAT."
PCP's nurse: "Where's that?"
Me: "In the hospital where you're standing right now."
Coumadin clinic (proactively): "You never tell us, anything! You never tell us anything! The answer is 'No, you can't do it!"
Act III
Me (to cardiologists nurse): "...having surgery and here's what they want him to do about the medicines...stop taking coumadin, start the Lovenox, stop taking aspirin..."
Cardiologist's nurse: "That's fine, but, he can't stop taking the aspirin."
Me: "OK, can you call the surgeon's nurse and tell her that?"
Cardiologist's nurse: "Sure I'll call you back."
Intermission
Cardiologist's nurse: "I talked to them, they want him to stop the aspirin."
Me: "OK."
Cardiologist's nurse: "He can't stop the aspirin."
Me: "Have I got this straight, then, he should both take the aspirin and stop the aspirin?"
Coumadin clinic (proactively): "You never tell us, anything! You never tell us anything! The answer is, 'No, you can't do it!"
Me:"Will you tell the coumadin people about this?"
Cardiologists nurse: "Yeah, I guess we should let them know."
Me: "Thanks, they're not going to like it a bit, are they?"
Cardiologist's nurse: "No, I think I'll just e-mail them."
My dad (getting cranky): "I'm just not gonna take any of it."
Me: "Groovy, but, when you die of a heart attack, it's not going to matter, really, if your back gets fixed or not."
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Oh my. And at least you are a medical professional, too. Imagine how it is for the rest of us!
The system in the US is famous all over the world!
You should have been a playwright. That was great! Good luck with surgery. Sounds like you both will need it!
It gets interesting when you have several "factors" to your health, and all super stars doctors! I agree with Bluegrass Mama. At least you deal with this more than the rest of us. Much love to you in this!
You're in our prayers - hang in there and thanks for keeping your chin up through all of this - you're an inspiration.
that just sounds like a long and trying day. I'm so sorry for you! I hope it all works out in the end.
I hope this is half as funny at your end as it is at mine. At least for a moment.
I'm so sorry busymom, I know it is rough on you. I am always impressed by how you go through life with grace and humor.
Geez....keep your sense of humor.
My Dad takes the Coumadin too. It's crazy, all the tracking they have to do on a regular basis. I can't imagine adding surgery. I know my Dad needs some teeth pulled (cuz it's bad for his heart) but they can't/won't because he could bleed to death. What the heck is a person supposed to do!?
I'll be keeping you and your Dad in my thoughts.
Hey BusyMom- my dad went through something similar five years ago with two hernia surgeries, and again two years ago for back surgery - while on meds for all the same things you mentioned. I remember the same thing (him asking when to stop one and start another). There weren't clear guidelines. My sister is a pharmacist and she guided him through it.
If it's encouraging the back surgery for my dad was a complete success. At 75 he's doing all the things he was doing before (riding horseback, working in his woodshop, outside all the time, and playing with his grandkids).
Praying for an easy surgery and recovery!
Can somebody explain to me please why professionals like this can not work together and formulate an answer? I understand it will take some work on their part, but seriously, how can the nurse have the audacity to call you back and give you that stop aspirin/don't stop as an "answer"? Obviously nobody bothered to get the doctors involved I am assuming, and they tried to "handle it themselves"
I am not blaming "nurses" just the idiotic buffoons (some of which happen to be nurses) for not completing the puzzle on behalf of the patient. Obviously if you are taking that much medication, and in need of surgery, you need these people to step and and handle it.
Good lord what a mess. I suggest taking copious notes, perhaps recording you phone coversations, and it may not hurt to hafve an attorney on speed dial.
Can somebody explain to me please why professionals like this can not work together and formulate an answer? I understand it will take some work on their part, but seriously, how can the nurse have the audacity to call you back and give you that stop aspirin/don't stop as an "answer"? Obviously nobody bothered to get the doctors involved I am assuming, and they tried to "handle it themselves"
I am not blaming "nurses" just the idiotic buffoons (some of which happen to be nurses) for not completing the puzzle on behalf of the patient. Obviously if you are taking that much medication, and in need of surgery, you need these people to step and and handle it.
Good lord what a mess. I suggest taking copious notes, perhaps recording you phone coversations, and it may not hurt to hafve an attorney on speed dial.
I feel bad that we are being so entertained by your personal hell.
Well when they get through drawing all that blood 3 cc's at a time, it wont matter if he takes the coumadin or the lovenox or the aspriin!! He wont have any left!!
They gave my dad an ATivan last night that kicked his a** so he wont be going home today after all. Maybe tomorrow. And they were giving him too much Coreg!! AAACK!!
My goodness... you are living my life!
My dad had surgery last December, and I swear I had the same conversation.
Medicine is wonderful about saving and ruining a person's life all at one time.
That was the best chuckle I've had in a long time! Thank you for writing that and I hope all goes well with your dad.
shew... I had to go get a coctail and a prozac at intermission!
So is the stress from worring about the aspirin supposed to take his mind off the surgery? Because really? That would work for me.
Wow! Are you kidding me? I take for granted that I have the Mayo Clinic in my backyard. Not that they are perfect by any means but jeez...
I like it, when will it be on broadway? I hope you don't sign away the movie rights....
Good luck.
Oh for Chrissake! Aren't we living in the Age of Communication? You need a traffic cop to sort all that mess out.
Bravo! Bravo!
Encore!
oh, wait... sorry. I thought it was a brilliant play and then i remembered it's your life!
In all seriousness...best of luck to you and your Dad. You are in my thoughts.