Monday, December 18
Five Alternative Warning Labels for ClothesI'm sure you've all seen the news where some professor in Britain advocates putting warning labels in "large" sized clothing because, apparently, obese people will bankrupt the health care system.
I can think of several warnings a lot more useful and realistic than that:
WARNING: May cause violation of basic fashion rules.
WARNING: Increased risk of butt-crack exposure. Not safe for children.
WARNING: Wearing this item may cause user to go home alone on Saturday night.
WARNING: Discontinue use if over 21 years of age.
WARNING: For best results, please go back 25 years.
1:37 PM |
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And for all men's clothing that is not a 'basic staple' the following warning should be added:
WARNING: Please consult a woman before mixing colors and/or patterns.
Certain fallen pop stars could use better instructions about where and when to actually wear certain items.
Speaking of crack you don't wanna see...
I've always advocated replacing security guards at the entrance to men's stores with the "fashion police"
This way if you try to leave with some hiddeous outfit, he (or she) could come running over, rip it out of your hands, with a slightly evil glare, and a condescending, "Just what the hell were you thinking?"
BAHAHAHAHAHA.
WARNING - May expose tummy fatand magnify it to extreme levels!! LOLOLOLOL
WARNING: Fat woman from New Orleans might clobber scrawney asshole from Britain.
well, just "from Britain" explains it all to begin with!
Amen!
Love it!
Here's a label that they should add to all those micro-tiny skirts the celebre-slut girls are wearing these days ---
WARNING: Best worn with underwear.