I simultaneously love and hate the fact that our house, and, it's contents are well "lived in".
The problem is that I'm never sure when love or hate is going to crop up, and, how it will manifest itself.
Some days, I look at the worn out and stained carpet in the den and think. "Wow, we've really lived on that carpet, I remember before we had kids, and, when it was new, we dreamed of our family spending time in that room together. Think of all the little kid snacks and craft projects it's seen. It's kept their feet warm, and, given the dogs a place to snooze for many years."
Other days? "That carpet is so ass-nasty, I'm going to go in there and rip it up with my own hands. Get the hell out of my way."
Some days, I see all the stuff around as joyful signs that we really use our house to the fullest, while other days, the same "stuff" everywhere can send me into a rage where I want nothing more than a house with only the barest of essentials.
There are some things around here that I bought right after we got married, but, before we bought a house. I can remember getting them. and, thinking, "Wow, our kids will be using this someday, maybe it will even be part of what they remember about growing up here."
Yet, sometimes I fuss at them for using those very things so they don't get worn out or used up. I guess I'm still subconsciously saving them for "someday", even though we're smack in the middle of the setting of my day dreams.
I know that a lived-in house full of happiness and good memories beats a cold, museum type house any day, but, perhaps I can have a well loved house that is immaculate, and, where we both use and don't use the things inside.
Is that so much to ask?
P.S. Thanks for all the chocolate, funnies and good wishes.
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Oh I SO know how what you mean! I'm currently in the middle of a 'Screaching Rage Of Hating Everything Because It's So Messy' phase.' (She says eyeing all the clutter and dustbunnies lurking) I know I should be doing something about it, although I still find myself wasting time here in the lovely uncluttered world of cyberspace..... ahhhhh!
I ask myself the same question at least twice a week.
Last year we redid our living room and took out the ass-nasty carpet and put in satillo tile (our living and dining and kitchen are one big room), but after we did it I was too, um, okay, lazy to put things back, plus we didnt get shelving for a corner so I could put back the "things." So for a year we have been living in the living room without "things" and we all love it. It is always clean and decluttered and a pick up and dust take five minutes. Next is my bedroom - my new motto is All Things Must Go.
Since my mom died, I have duch a carpe diem approach-- I'm using everything, and throwing away stuff that doesn't get used as fast as I can.
I'm hoping at the end we'll have a lived in house with empty spaces that REALLY show the dirt and scratched up walls.
We put in new carpet last year, and I had wild dreams of clean carpet all the time (with a 7 year old and a 2 year old - yah right). All it took was one night, a few months later, when the older child didn't QUITE make it to the bathroom with his upset stomach to cure me of my analness. Carpet is carpet...it can be replaced. But, having family (even ones that puke) is so much more than that, you know? :-)
"Smack in the middle of the setting of my day dreams." Good place to be...even if it is a bit of a mess!
I can totally relate to this. Somedays I look at my house (when everything is cleaned up mind you) an I think...what a great place. The next day I'm looking at real estate listing to see if there is a better place to stuff with my well...stuff!
Yeah, I totally understand. But I gotta tell ya, my sister-in-law's house is always immaculate and I am never comfortable there. My sister's house however, like mine, is truly 'well-worn' and I love hanging out with the mess. Nothing says 'homey' like an ass-nasty carpet.
"I can have a well loved house that is immaculate, and, where we both use and don't use the things inside."
I don't think you can have your cake and...well you know the rest ;)
Were you talking about my house? My neighbor says we have an excuse to have a messy house-our little ones are making good memories. I don't know how they FIND the toys to make good memories, but at least they are building up their immune system. Their white blood cells are tough little suckers!!
You sound like such a ....mom! I'm with Chris--I'm never comfortable in an immaculate house. I'm always afraid I'll spill something.
This is my first time to your site, and not my last. The site is so nice & navigable, and I love that busy mom logo. Good work, and nice post btw.
You are SO talking about me and my house. 75% of the time, it drives me crazy and I'm screaming at my husband that we need to move to a bigger place (see http://mamalaw.blogspot.com/2006/12/claustrophobia.html) and the other 25% I think "oh what a nice, cozy home we have." You can't win, really. As my sister-in-law with the big house says "a bigger house just means more stuff and more room for clutter." yeah whatever, heifer. Try me.
New carpet is great until you get the first stain on it. Then you might as well have the old carpet back. I have tolerated my fifteen year old carpet by reminding myself it is something to WALK on. That and after one week of new carpet, Clark would have it looking like the old carpet, with coffee colored dalmation spots.
Life is a grindstone. Whether it grinds us down or polishes us up depends on us.