Babyproofing Your Marriage
After Busy Girl was born, boy did Busy Dad and I had some humdingers of arguments, often in the middle of the night, with a crying baby. She never, ever slept, and, neither did we.
I can remember him saying to me, "How can I help?" one night when I was dealing with her while she was crying for hours on end. I just screamed at him, "You're the FATHER! You're not here to "help" me, I'm not in charge, just DO something!"
Lovely, eh? Yeah, he couldn't win, no matter what he said.
If you're married, or have a significant other, and, have ever had a child you seriously need Babyproofing Your Marriage: How to Laugh More, Argue Less, and Communicate Better as Your Family Grows by Stacie Cockrell, Cathy O'Neill, and, Julia Stone.
It's all about what having a baby can do to a mariage. It's a humorous and practical account of what happens when you become parents, with commentary from both the mother and father's side.
Even though it's been a few years since we've had a small baby, what tremendous relief to know we're not alone in our "issues". It covers such topics as "scorekeeping" (the who's working harder? game), the extreme parenting phenomenon, family relationships (OK, the in-laws), the sex-life of parents entitled "coitus non-existus", and having more kids.
One of the parts that spoke to me:
Most women believe their husbands simply don't understand how much there is to do. What we consider mandatory, they view as optional.
That right there, my friends, is the source of much of our conflict. Don't worry guys, it gives your side of this issue, too, and, I have learned a lot from it.
So, this is one you gotta have, go out and get it now. There's even a discussion board all about how having a baby has impacted your marriage.



























